Whale sized

For many years now, I've had some form of the following dream:
Swimming in the ocean or a pool and suddenly aware that right alongside me is a whale.

These dreams make whale watching kind of terrifying for me.

I feel so outsized by these animals in my dreams and of course, I assume it is because I don't like to be close to big overwhelming feelings. I like them at a distance where I can keep them nice and tame.

However, now I have come to attempt to embrace the whale as my companion and the other day I was given a little nudge.  The whale for me is a symbol of all the big feelings that I need to just accept so that I can deal with them. The other morning it was foggy and I was drawn to the tall ships to take pictures.  The water was still and out of the corner of my eye, I saw a whale surface. I stopped what I was doing and watched it surface a few more times.Just under the surface, metres away, is my most feared animal.  Yet, I was filled with wonder and I could not wait for it to surface again and again, pushing me to confront and accept its largeness next to my smallness.