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Breadcrumbs

...I really really like being awake.

I love sleep too, but not as much.

I'm learning that I like being awake more-even when being awake excessively is going to make me miserable later. I love snatching hours in the middle of the night.  Hours I can spend any way I like, watching shows, writing, cleaning stuff.

Of the 24 hours I've been allotted, I keep trying to push the percentage of awake time up because, well, "what's sleep?" I like borrowing against sleeping time so I can have some quiet time.

What I did not see is that being awake so much has been making me less patient, dull in ways I don't like and unhealthy.

So, I made a decision that I will really need to get to know sleep more. As the mirror image of being awake, sleep is something I have neglected so much I have stopped knowing its edges. It's depths, it's beauty.  I am going to start by seeing it as not optional to skip and take it from there.

I also have decided to see sleep as a nutrient.  The more I get, the more being awake will be the alert and exquisite experience it can be.

Ultimately, I've decided to use all the reasons I like being awake to learn to follow the tiny breadcrumbs, the little morsels shining in the moonlight to lead me to sleep and later, waking to the gauzy, pink dawn.



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